“My God, My God, Why Have You Forsaken Me?”

This past December, I made my first out of the country trip. I went to Israel and had the opportunity to walk where Jesus walked. This trip to the Holy land will never stop impacting my life. One of the more intense impacts it made was a realization I had at the Garden Tomb.

This is a photo of the inside of the garden tomb. They believe that Jesus was laid to rest in this tomb.

The Garden Tomb is one of the locations that is believed to be the possible (temporary) resting place for Jesus. We were able to hear incredible stories about how the Garden Tomb was found and why it is believed that it is highly likely this was His tomb. We sat there and listened and I was: praying, thinking, processing, doing everything I could to soak it all up. I found myself doing that a lot more during this trip. I would be trying to process something and I would go to the Lord and almost talk it out to Him. It helped me to understand all the information that I was being told.

We had this incredible tour guide explaining the story of the crucifixion and the reason people believe this site is historically accurate. She continues to share some of her personal story with us. As she is speaking about horrendous loss she says “I am so thankful that I never had to walk that hurt alone”.

This is my parents looking over at the skull face on the hill that has been used to identify His tomb because it was mentioned in all of the gospels.

It was in this exact moment that it clicked and my jaw fell and tears rolled from my eyes. Many of you are probably familiar with the words Christ said while hanging on the cross. For those who are not, let’s paint the full picture. Christ has made it up the horrid walk and is now nailed onto the standing cross. Below Him roman soldiers draw lots of who is going to get the garments of Jesus. As His tattered, blood stained, dirty material items are being fought over in front of his beaten and bleeding body; Christ calls out “Father, forgive them. for they know not what they do” the soldiers below him heard this and laughed saying “He saved others; let Him save Himself”. This interaction is always so humbling to me. He is in agony. A pain that can’t be quantified or understood fully. Yet, He is still doing this completely selfless act, even then He is still thinking about God’s children. In the 9th hour, as the clouds rolled in and the sky turned to black, Christ called out “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?”.

This was the wonderful guide who shared her life story and explained why this is believed to be one of the more possible sites of Jesus’ tomb.

My whole life, when I heard this part of the crucifixion and the statement “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” I had thought it was Jesus saying I prayed so hard Lord, I did everything you asked, Help me. When in reality, this is the moment, the one and only moment, that the son of God would be separated from God himself. When I realized this walking the winding path around the Garden Tomb, I was stopped in my tracks.

This was a little seating area where we talked about the stories and archeological finds that have lead people to this site. Someone had made a cross in rocks and it was just another special moment.

Wait, you mean to say that Christ went through the crucifixion alone. He didn’t have God right beside Him as He always had? During the most painful moment of His life? That is another thing we are fortunate to NEVER have to experience. We are NEVER alone. God is ALWAYS with us. I started thinking about all the pain I have had, all the surgeries I have had, every test and procedure; I had God with me. I never had to go to battle alone. Christ did. He was separated from His God during the crucifixion and that hit me hard. To be separated from our heavenly father when we are suffering would be unbearable and Jesus did that so we never would have to experience it. He took on the sin of the world. God could not look or be with that much evil. They had to be separated. Wow. The sacrifices of Jesus Christ seem to never end.

Maybe this is something that you have always understood but even if it was I think we can all use the reminder. Christ was dealing with more than physical pain on that cross. He did all of that willingly. He did everything as the Father asked Him. Today, we do not have to fear. God is ALWAYS with us. I have found comfort in that statement too many times to count and yet, during Christ’s most painful moments He did not have that. I have been humbled more than I ever have been before. The love, the sacrifice, the hurt, and the power are beyond words.

One of the absolutely exquisite mosaics that were made in the churches we saw. This was so powerful.

I know that we all intake information differently so I pray that you respect my vulnerability and I hope it encourages you to be vulnerable as well. Christ emphasizes fellowship because vulnerability comes from shame which is not of God it is of the devil. God wants us to share our vulnerabilities so they don’t have power over us. I pray you all find people in your circle who will pray for you, be vulnerable with you, respect your vulnerabilities, and encourage you in your relationship with Christ.