One of my favorite places in all of Israel was the Garden of Gethsemane. I love how I could feel the presence of my God so powerfully. This was where Jesus wept over what was to come for him. This was where Jesus begged his father to save him and find away for this to happen differently. However, when his father didn’t have that option He accepted the plan with grace. I pray that I stay like this for Christ. I pray that the decisions that I make and the life I live whether it involves health problems or not. I remember praying for answers on whether I should have my surgery and I remember Christ telling me that he wasn’t done with me. It was a hard and painful decision and there are days that i feel like I made the wrong call but I listened to my God so I know I am doing what I was called to do.

Sometimes the best thing to do is to write out how you feel. It is hard being chronically ill and sometimes its hard to keep being positive. This poem is about depression and how it holds you hostage. How depression doesnt stop for anyone.